Have you ever lost yourself in blissful dreams of romantic reverie? Romantic reveries are the ghosts of possibility. Thinking about an old holiday romance; an old flame rekindled or a passing attraction to someone in the street are all designed to give you the feeling of love, without the heartache. So what if the holiday fling has moved on or the old flame is now married; there are more pebbles on the beach! An independent spirit together with a rosy romantic glow might turn you into the prize catch of the county if you play the game right. Perfecting the art of being the one that gets away is great; just remember to break habit when you meet someone you really like! I confess to being an unashamed New Age Romantic and I find joy in daydreaming. It annoys me a little when people assume that because I am a romantic I must have unrealistic expectations of a relationship. This is not the case at all; I am fully aware that true love does NOT conquer all; that relationships are hard work; that they can horribly go wrong and life is not a perpetual bed of roses; but does that reality mean that I must cut myself off from the dream of romance?
Women are romantic creatures; we dream of love from a young age, even before we are old enough to understand the emotions we are experiencing. Our heart throbs to the sound of a moonlight serenade; we sigh to hear a declaration of love; we smile and get butterflies to hear the sound of our name on his lips. Even a happily married woman can still have a mad crush on an actor or singer, which can lend her marriage more spice! The goddess might have crafted women from starlight and roses; romance is how we were made.
Women dream of love and passion all the time; in my dreams I have had a shower with Brad Pitt and married Morten Harket, while my best friend frequently gets busy with Jon Bon Jovi. Its a natural part of our make up. Romance is important to us, whether we are in a couple or single and fancy-free. Sometimes the dream of romance can become painful - when you have just gone through a break-up, its hard watching Elizabeth marry Darcy; but once you can sit down and enjoy a romance film or novel without wanting to devour a freezer full of ice cream, that is your heart telling you its on the mend.
Something wonderful happens to a woman who is coming through the other side of a break-up or a relationship disaster; she reclaims her status as a single women with a tiny shiver of anticipation. The dream of Romance guides her back out into the world again; suddenly she is aware of the magic of possibility. She begins to explore and enhance her own powers of attraction - a new hair cut or colour; a shopping spree for fab clothes and a new image; a trip to a make-up counter to try out a new look; she is free to be who she wants to be again and this can be quite intoxicating. Her eyes are wide open; not only has she reassessed her past and acknowledged the mistakes she might have made, she has congratulated herself on regaining her freedom. Now she steps out of her door with a sense of "What's next?" as she is free to look, and to look back at anyone who catches her eye and takes her fancy; "Is it you?" she wonders. Rapunzel is letting her hair down and enjoying the effect as she turns heads wherever she goes. She enjoys flirting for a brief moment and then swiftly moving on - she is not ready to give up her independence any time soon, she is having too much fun as a single girl, but she takes pleasure in her powers of attraction. Like Rapunzel's braid she has been tightly bound within the confines of a relationship - now she wants to shake her tresses free and feel the wind in her hair. It seems to me that the one guarantee about romance is that love, when it happens, is always an unexpected surprise. So go on, let down your hair and see what the wind blows in...